Oarai School Forum: No Boys Allowed
by roguespirit
Summary: Why aren't boys supposedly not allowed to do tankery? Taiga Ou, Oarai's crack reporter has assembled a panel of experts from around the Tankery community to root the answer from under the piles upon piles of speculation and conspiracy, only she didn't quite get what she bargained for with these girls. Rated T for Mild Curses.


All over the town of Oarai and the school ship it hosted, people gathered around their television sets and computer screens, all eagerly awaiting the program that they had been anticipating for almost two weeks and was about to begin.

Turned to the correct channel or webpage a quick countdown displayed the seconds till the beginning of the show until it transitioned to a bright colourful logo with flashing lights around it, almost like a nineties game show. The logo faded revealing a large horseshoe shaped white table with seven girls sat along its outside edge. The studio audience clapped and cheered as the camera zoomed in and focused on the one sat in the middle. She wore wide rimmed, round glasses and short hair chestnut-brown hair. She wore Oarai's school uniform and held a small stack of papers in her hands. She smiled at the camera and greeted the audience.

"Greetings everyone and welcome to this latest episode of Oarai High Forum, the show where we discuss popular topics with a panel of knowledgeable guests. I'm your host, Taiga Ou. Please help me welcome our panel for today. Beginning on my right, from St. Gloriana Girls College and captain of their Tankery team: Darjeeling."

The crowd in the studio applauded as Darjeeling finished a sip of her tea. She gave them an almost royal smile and a graceful bow of her head. Even in such an informal setting her poise and demeanor were as sharp and regal as ever, earning her many admiring gazes from the audience.

"And next we have, from Saunders Academy, captain of their tankery team-" Taiga was cut off as the indicated guest leapt to her feet, almost knocking her chair over in her haste, and waved at the audience with both arms.

"Hey everyone in the audience and at home, I'm Kay! I love ya' I really do!" She started blowing kisses at the studio audience and the cameras, while Taiga and some of the other guests looked on in bewilderment.

"Uh... right." Taiga smiled awkwardly, grateful when Kay finally sat down and then introduced the next girl. "And our final guest on the right side of the table, please welcome Anchovy, captain of Anzio Academy's tankery team."

Anchovy sat cross legged and slouched in her chair, still wearing her tankery overalls. Her face had a rather neutral or indifferent expression. Her only acknowledgment of her name being announced was a slight raising of her riding crop from its resting place on the table. Taiga didn't appear bothered by this and went on.

"Also, I'd like to take this time to thank Anzio for providing the snacks for the panel this evening. We'll be bringing those out a little later so please look forward to it. I know I do!" She now gestured to her left.

"Now beginning on my left side of the table we have, joining us from Black Forest Peak, Jagdpanther commander Ritaiko.

Grimacing slightly, the girl waved. Her wedge sat on its side on the table directly in front of her. Without it on her head, a lot of people hadn't recognized her at first.

"And next to her we have, representing our very own Oarai tankery team, our champions; resident tank otaku Yukari Akiyama!" The crowd roared with triumphant cheers and thunderous applause. Yukari waved shyly, her face a deep red shade from all the sudden attention on her, cowering under the gazes of the audience and cyclopic eyes of the cameras.

"And our final guest for tonight, yet another tankery captain. All the way from Pravda we have the Swirling Snow: Katyusha."

The diminutive girl stood up on her chair and raised two fists in the air as the crowed clapped and cheered. "Hahahaha, yes, cheer for the great Katyusha!" Many of the other girls at the table watched her with amused smiles while Darjeeling pretended not to notice and continued sipping her tea. Anchovy rolled her eyes and leaned back in her chair.

"Alright then!" Taiga began. "Now that introductions are done let's introduce our topic for the night. As you've probably guessed from our guests it's tankery, and our first question is one that has been coming up a lot with the sudden resurgence in popularity for tankery." She tapped her papers on the table. "The question is: 'Why are boys not allowed to do tankery' or 'why are don't they do it if they are allowed?" She looked around at all the guests, gauging their reactions. "I think the confusion from everyone comes from how men ended up not doing tankery when they were the ones fighting in tanks during war right?"

Kay crossed her arms while her brows furrowed and eyes closed in contemplation. "Hmmmm well you know, tankery is an exclusively girls sport. And that means only girls do it. Her expression morphed into a broad smile. "So yeah, that's the reason." The other girls stared at Kay, some exasperated, others feigning polite smiles.

"Um, I think why that is the case is what needs to be explored." Taiga said carefully. She looked around to the other girls at the table. "Does anyone else have any opinions?"

Anchovy leaned forward and bent her riding crop between her hands. "Isn't it just that men aren't allowed to operate tanks outside of the defense forces because they are too destructive? I seem to remember that being a reason."

Darjeeling gently placed her tea back on the table and folded her hands onto her lap. "I realize that is what people say; however, I think it is just something brought about by fear after the wars. It was destruction on a level the world had never before and with so many men dead afterwards women took a greater role in society. It is not surprising that some people overreacted. After all that destruction and death I highly doubt that the men who were left would have been so eager to do more."

Ritaiko raised her hand. "I think it's most important that we look at the purpose of tankery to highlight why boys don't do it. Basically it is a woman's martial art, and the whole purpose of it is for girls to develop self-esteem, grow us into professional and efficient citizens, and nurture the skills and abilities necessary for motherhood. Those are the aims of tankery. I fail to see how men would be interested in it then so really the question is moot is it not?"

Kay huffed. "Just sounds like marketing to me. I fail to see how tankery has anything to do with any of that. What do you learn in tankery that would make you a better mom?"

Ritaiko narrowed her eyes at the blonde and leaned across the table towards her. "Confidence, leadership. You have to lead by example when you're a team captain or a tank commander. That is one of the most important things in motherhood because children learn from their parents example."

Yukari raised a hand timidly as well. "Ah, I also think that tankery can do wonders for one's self-esteem. I myself was not very confident before, but thanks to tankery I have more friends than I've ever had and I feel more confident than I ever have."

"Would you be as confident if you had lost?" Anchovy cut in. "Considering the miracle you pulled of at the tournament I don't think you can be a credible example of the confidence tankery can instill."

Yukari's fingers curled on the table. Anchovy's harsh and bitter tone cutting into her a bit, and that she might have a point cut even deeper, if only just. "I... I don't think that's true. Even after we lost to St. Gloriana I still felt satisfied. I was doing something that I'd always wanted to do, and after my first real battle I felt like I would be able to do better!"

Darjeeling lifted her chin slightly and opened her eyes. "Perhaps thinking of ways tankery has benefited lives outside of tankery might be best. While I can agree that tankery can foster skills used in motherhood, that can also depend a lot on the culture of the school as well."

More than a few glances at the table went in Kay's direction but the bodacious blonde had her eyes closed in a rare moment of thoughtfulness, her chin gently grasped between her thumb and index finger, so she failed to take notice.

There was loud bang as Katyusha slammed her little palms on the table and stood up. "You're over complicating everything! Obviously tankery makes you stronger and better! Before tankery nobody payed attention to Katyusha and everyone called Katyusha a runt." The diminutive girl stood on top of her chair and stuck her chest out proudly, her hands on her hips. "Now Katyusha is a captain and everyone knows her name and looks up to Katyusha, now that she stands above everyone else!"

As the girls still sat at the table gazing at Katyusha, not having to look up very much in spite of the boost in height Katyusha got from standing on the chair, their expressions were a mixed bag. Taiga looked a bit bewildered, not knowing what to do or say for the moment. Ritaiko rolled her eyes and leaned her head on her right hand, propped up on the table by her elbow. Yukari smiled awkwardly, trying hard to avoid any expression that might seem rude, while Kay and Darjeeling's smiles were more genuine and represented amusement and appreciation for Katyusha's point of argument more than anything else. Finally, Anchovy just stared at Katyusha with a bored look on her face as if expecting her sudden outburst all along.

"W-well then" Taiga began, trying to get the discussion back on track. "Can anyone think of specific ways that tankery has helped in their daily lives? Uh, Akiyama, you mentioned it provided you more confidence and improved your social life. Has it helped in any other way?"

Yukari pushed her chin up with her index finger thoughtfully, tilting her head just a bit to the side. I suppose I'm not as easily intimidated as I used to be. Compared to facing down huge late-war Panzers and cannon fire, an angry classmate or a... confrontational one... Uh, well suddenly those situations seem so trivial now."

Ritaiko nodded understanding. "I know what you mean. Compared to the trials you go through with training, harsh correction from seniors and keeping up with school work on top of that, you just don't have time to deal with people getting in your way so you often have to go through them. At times like that it's important that teams and crews stick together and support each other."

Anchovy began gently tapping her riding crop in her hand. "I agree. People in the tankery teams work very hard, as much or more than anyone on any other sports team in far worse conditions. That toughens you up a lot so dealing with bullies or other irritants becomes so trifling." She grinned. "I remember when a girl on the karate team tried to pick a fight with one of our crews. She talked awfully big but one thing you have to learn in tankery is to not play how the other team expects you or wants you to play. I guess she wasn't expecting to be tackled by the loader." She smacked her riding crop on the table. "Before she could blink she was pinned to the ground and looked like a complete fool! Camaraderie and responsibility to your comrades is something you learn doing tankery. You individually become stronger and the whole becomes even stronger than that."

Kay leaned back in her chair and tilted her head back. "Awww you guys take it way too seriously. Tankery is a place to just go out and have some fun, maybe blow some things up. It's a fun sport and at the end of the day, that's all it has to be."

"Blasphemy!" Ritaiko yelled. "Tankery is a sacred art that makes you as strong as steel and gives you the determination to charge though everything life throws at you!"

"Please please let's not get too carried away!" Taiga yelled, trying to keep order and prevent a snowballing argument from overtaking the discussion. "We're just discussing how tankery positively affects everyone's daily life. Now uh, does anyone else have anything to suggest?"

Ritaiko calmed herself and sat at attention in her chair, trying to show that she was disciplined, while Kay acted as if she didn't care, turning her head away from the table and looking bored.

"I would like to add my own opinions if you would like to hear them." Darjeeling offered in her serene, creamy voice.

"Oh yes, please. I'm sure everyone would love to hear it." Taiga said, failing to hide the relief in her voice with their discussion finally going back on topic. Yukari likewise leaned forward keenly, while Katyusha simply stared at the dainty blonde, albeit respectfully.

"I believe that at St. Gloriana, our method of tankery helps refine us and allows us to face adversity while maintaining composure and rationality. By treating ourselves and our opponents with respect we maintain our integrity and strength of character, granting us respect in return. The spirit of chivalry we instill in ourselves inspires others around us and they learn by our examples, helping everyone around us improve as we do."

The synapses behind Taiga's eyes lit up. "Ah that's true. I remember when you came to Oarai for that pre-tournament friendly match a lot of the girls at your school were absolutely fawning over you. You and your team seem to be highly admired."

Darjeeling's expression didn't change from it's ostensibly permanent calm smile, but somehow Taiga's comment seemed to make her shine. Ritaiko's eyes narrowed at her slightly but she made no comment. Kay shrugged it off and stretched her arms while Anchovy scowled.

"Ah I remember that too." Yukari said. Her voice was saturated with the flavor of reminiscence and her gaze was directed up at the ceiling with her chin resting on her hand. "It was my first ever tank match so I remember it well. All the students seemed to admire you so much, almost like they worshiped you."

Darjeeling let out a furry chuckle. "Well I believe that 'worship' is a bit too strong a word, but you saw for yourself how we are admired. We try to set a good example for all those girls and they in turn encourage us to maintain our integrity." She took a sip of her tea. "At St. Gloriana, we do not use only tankery as a means of trying to encourage ladylike behavior and skills, but through the very nature of our school and its culture. Being refined, and elegant on the battlefield has enabled us to be the same way during ordinary life's trials and tribulations."

Taiga clapped her hands together. "A very insightful and inspiring message from St. Gloriana. Perhaps it is the case that while Tankery can provide benefits, not everyone takes advantage of them. As insightful as that all is though, we still haven't fully answered why boys aren't allowed to do tankery; although, we may have answered why they wouldn't even want to."

Yukari gave her head a brief scratch. "Well maybe it has to do with how segregated the education system is. For high school's it's all all girls or all boys schools so I think that leaves out anything gender based."

Katyusha looked at her incredulously. "Huh? What do you mean gender based? You think boys would have more of an advantage in tankery than us? Hmph, Katyusha isn't so weak that she wouldn't be able to keep up with puny boys. They would have to keep up with Katyusha!"

Kay laughed. "Yeah, I fail to see how guys would have any advantage in tankery. Girls are usually smaller so we'd have more space to move around and stuff right?"

"Well it's also likely they would have an easier time loading with their greater average muscle mass." Yukari countered uneasily. "Which also might help with driving some tanks that have stiff controls. I know that the T-34 can be exhausting to drive because of how much strength it takes to move the steering levers."

The tiny Pravda commander snorted. "Katyusha never had trouble driving the T-34s. Besides it can't be harder than most other tanks."

"Ahh, well actually, hard as it might be to believe, the Tiger is actually quite easy to drive. Physically that is." Yukari explained.

Ritaiko nodded in agreement. "Yes, many of our tanks are fairly easy to control, even if you have to be careful how you drive them."

"Because your tanks are sturdy as glass." Katyusha admonished. "Katyusha's tanks are strong as steel yet still as swift as antelope!"

"Simple you mean. Appropriate for simple minds." Ritaiko shot back.

Katyusha glared at her. "Hah, says the team that relies totally on brute force and superior tanks. Pravda proved it a year ago at the nationals and Oarai lay it out naked for the entire world to see this year!"

Ritaiko's face reddened with anger and her hands balled into white knuckled fists. "At least we didn't throw away an easy victory because we wanted a nap you little titsucker."

Katyusha gawked and slammed her hands on the table and standing up, her face red. Whether it was out of embarrassment or anger, it was hard to tell. "Are you calling Katyusha a baby? Katyusha is not such thing. Katyusha is a mature, grown up lady."

Grimaces went around some of the girls around the table as they tried to contain bursts of laughter but both Anchovy and Ritaiko didn't hold back their snickers.

"Mature grown up ladies don't refer to themselves in the third person." Anchovy snarked. "But also, basically throwing a match doesn't show the kind of ineptitude and general incompetence shown by Black Forest when all their big guns, big tanks, and scary reputation amounted to basically nothing. You even got the Maus taken out of all things. You had every advantage and you weren't able to beat them. At least Pravda was able to bring Oarai to a position of defeat, even if they didn't land the killing blow at the time, at least they got that far."

Kay smirked. "Way to remain neutral Salty."

Anchovy looked at Kay befuddled. "Salty?"

Katusha laughed, pointing at the twin-tailed girl. "Hahaha, because you are Anchovy and you have a bad attitude. Katyusha gets the joke, foolish fish girl."

"Ah it's about time for our first break!" Taiga suddenly interrupted. "Let's take this moment to let our guests get their thoughts in order and to thank our sponsors. When we come back we'll be having the snacks which have been made by Anzio and you don't want to miss that. Stay tuned!"

The recording lights on the cameras went out and the instant they did, Taiga slumped in her seat, sighing heavily. As good as disputes among the guests could be for ratings and maintaining the audience's attention, it was quite stressful on the host. Many audience members were also shuffling out, taking advantage of the three minute break to relieve their bladders.

Katyusha huffed and turned away from the table. "I'm going to the washroom." She said, and headed stage left off the set with a defiant child-like march.

"I'd better go too" Kay said as she stood up. "Don't wanna' risk an accident on tv after all. You coming too Jeely?" She asked the only other blonde remaining at the table. "With all the tea you've been drinkin' your dam's probably having a hard time holding back the waters I bet." Kay's casual, tactless talk and toothy grin did nothing to endear her to the refined and elegant Darjeeling, whose small but constant and pleasant smile degraded into a soft frown and she did not so much as look in Kay's direction when she answered.

"While I appreciate your concern, I believe I am old and wise enough to know when I need to use the lavatory and I made sure to go before the show began."

Kay shrugged and walked around the table, patting Darjeeling on the head as she went by. "Suit yourself duchess." Without another word or glance, the obtrusive girl followed Katyusha's path stage left to the washrooms, jogging lightly to make up for any lost time. Darjeeling was clearly irritated by the head pat, which had been rather heavy. Her brows were heavily furrowed and a mild scowl disrupted her normally placid face. Anchovy watched her with amusement, grinning at the normally unflappable faux British girl.

Taiga took that moment to excuse herself from the table and go speak to her producer, a svelte girl with short black hair and wide rimmed glasses. "Umi, how are things going on social media? Things seemed like they were starting to get ugly."

Umi sighed. "Well it certainly caused an activity jump, but it doesn't seem like anyone benefited from what happened. At the most it'll be used by the internet masses for memes, they'll upload clips onto youtube, and there will probably be gifs, all widely distributed. All good for getting our show noticed but not really good for the reputation of the show. We're just trying to be factual, we're not a late-night talk show."

Taiga winced. "R-right. I'll try to head them off better next time."

"You were doing pretty well at the beginning, but you seemed to lose control a bit back there."

Taiga hung her head. "Yeah I guess I did. I'm not sure what happened. Maybe things just ran away from me."

"Well just try to keep a lid on things for the rest of the show. Let's hope those girls come back before the break is up. I can't imagine only three minutes for a bathroom break."

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Katyusha yanked open the door to the washroom and stomped inside a few steps before stopping. The second she heard the soft whump of the door closing she sent her little fist into the pink tiled wall before she vomited a torrent of Russian curses that lasted for a full ten seconds. "Damn that stupid arrogant Black Forest bitch. Thinking Katyusha is a child just because Katyusha says her name a lot. Everyone needs to know Kayusha is referring to Katyusha don't they?" She stomped towards the sink and turned on the taps, wetting her hands before rubbing the water in her face. "Puny girl should know not to mess with Katyusha."

The squeak of the door opening caused her to momentarily freeze up. She watched the reflection in the mirror and relaxed when she saw Kay come in. Kay didn't really talk to her during the discussion so she didn't seem hostile.

"Hey there tiger." She greeted, a fluffy chortle in her tone. "Just gathering your strength before you try to take another bite?" She made her way into one of the stalls and shut it before waiting for a reply from the much shorter girl.

"K-Katyusha only needed to wash her hands and refresh herself to keep looking her best in front of the cameras. Katyusha is representing her school and tankery team after all." Katyusha heard Kay's light giggle echo off the ceramic tiles of the walls and floor, making it almost seem like it was coming from all around her.

"Aww don't worry Katy, I'm not making fun of you or anything. I thought it was great how you brought Black Forest down a peg. Seriously, they don't make friends with anybody."

Katyusha huffed. "They've been on the top of the mountain so long they forgot how things are at the bottom. Even people who know only the flat steppes can learn to climb mountains." There was a detectable pause as Katyusha finished washing her hands and splashed some water in her face to help clear her head.

The door to Kay's stall creaked open, revealing Kay in the reflection of the mirror. The taller blonde walked up to the sink next to Katyusha and proceeded to wash her hands. "Are you good at climbing mountains then Katy?"

Katyusha shut her eyes, as if trying to not see the flood of memories, mostly unpleasant flash before them. "Katyusha has spent her whole life climbing mountains. Even when she reaches one peak, there's another one even higher up and Katyusha must get to it." She shook her hands clear and walked to the paper towel dispenser to dry them. "The next peak is always higher; therefore, Katyusha must keep climbing.

Kay finished washing her hands and went next to the dispenser to dry them. "When do you think you'll take a break from climbing and just have some fun. If life is always work to you, and I know it isn't or else you wouldn't take so many naps, you'll just burn yourself out."

Katyusha blushed. "N-naps are necessary for Katyusha to rest so she can keep climbing." Her expression turned solemn. "You always have to keep climbing, or else you will get stepped on by people higher than you. If you are higher than everyone else though, then you don't have to worry about being stepped on and you can be the one doing the stepping."

Kay hummed thoughtfully. "Hmmmm but doesn't that just make you a bully?"

Katyusha bristled and her little hands balled up into fists. "N-no. Katyusha doesn't bully others, bullying only means they are afraid of people beneath them. What kind of leader fears the people under their own command? That is not being on a mountain peak; it's just standing on a big mound of pebbles." She threw open the door. "Hurry up, the break is almost over."

Kay sighed and tossed her damp paper towels into the trash. At least she now understood the pint-sized Pravda captain a little bit better now, and maybe she also respected her a little more as well.

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"Arrgh, why aren't they back yet?" Taiga sat at the table watching the clock mounted on the ceiling count down with less than a minute left in the break before the debate resumed. Katyusha and Kay were still gone to the washroom and hadn't come back yet, leaving everyone else anxiously waiting. Her papers were half crumpled as she held them tightly in her hands even as Anchovy seemed completely bored and Darjeeling's mask of calm remained as implacable as ever. Ritaiko had also calmed down and now seemed more embarrassed at the earlier quarrel with Katyusha than angry anymore. Well hopefully that would reduce the likelihood of it happening again, at least during the debate, but until the other two got here the debate couldn't go on properly.

Her earpiece crackled to life and she straightened up as Umi's voice came through. "They're getting back onto the stage. Get ready."

Taiga sighed in relief and unclenched her hands, letting the half-crumpled papers flop onto the table. "Finally." She started to flatten out her papers on the table to try and work the kinks out and adopted her news face and posture. Katyusha and Kay arrived and made their way to their seats. Annoyingly to Taiga, they showed no extra haste even as the clearly visible timer counted down from ten seconds. She didn't relax until Kay finally sat herself down and assumed her usual nonchalant sitting position, and for a moment Taiga thought she might put her feet up on the table. 'Wouldn't that get on Darjeeling's nerves' she thought to herself.

Finally the timer finished counting down and the 'On Air' sign lit up red. "Welcome back everyone. We've had a few minutes to collect our thoughts and refresh our minds so now our panel is back to get back to the topic at hand, but just before that we will present our snacks for the night, made courtesy of Anzio." She gave a nod towards Anchovy he smiled proudly and nodded in return. A few girls wearing Anzio's school uniforms pushed small metal carts onto the stage, each laden with scrumptious looking snacks. "Tell us Anchovy, what are we munching on tonight?"

Anchovy smiled and gestured to the dish being set beside her by her school mate. "This is an antipasto called Bruschetta. It's basically grilled bread mixed with garlic and topped with cheese and olive oil."

"So what; it's Italian toast?" Kay asked.

Anchovy snorted derisively. "Of course not. Bruschetta actually takes some skill and effort to make. You cannot simply pop it into a toaster and set a timer. As a result you get much better quality food and some people top it with tomatoes to add flavor and there's the health benefits of eating tomatoes as well." Kay simply shrugged, indicating her indifference on the matter.

Katyusha had already managed to cram all of hers into her mouth, causing her cheeks to bulge out like a busy chipmunk. The Anzio girls delivering the food seemed pleased by Katyusha's boorish manners and placed another two dishes in front of her. They seemed pleased to have someone enjoying their food so much. By contrast Darjeeling had barely taken two delicate bites out of her's, taking the time to thoroughly chew ever bite; while Taiga, Ritaiko and Yukari were only about halfway done. Anchovy had been given one as well but was just now picking it up to start eating it.

"Well then" Taiga said as she put down her snack. "Since we had a very good discussion on our main topic for the night, perhaps there are some questions that we could answer from Chirper and get things rolling again. I imagine some will be about this but most will probably be questions raised about Tankery in general." Taiga took out a small tablet and checked the show's Chirper feed to see if she could find some questions. "Let's see..., ah. LelushaViBritannia says: 'Are boys not allowed in Tankery because people are afraid of illicit relationships similar to why all schools are segregated?'"

Anchovy waved her hand contemptuously. "Nobody really understands why the government made all schools segregated. I don't think that has anything to do with why boys don't do tankery. Probably doesn't help though."

Kay nodded. "Yeah, girls and boys only meet when we dock at our home port, and let me tell you, the temperature shoots up the second that happens."

Darjeeling smiled. "Absence makes the heart grow fonder. And a watched kettle never boils." The other girls looked at her absolutely perplexed. Darjeeling may seem ladylike most of the time, but others she seemed more than a little crackers.

"Uhh... Well it doesn't really come up often at Black Forest Peak." Ritaiko began. "In fact, a lot of girls on our team have never really talked to boys much outside of their families."

Kay winced. "Ouch. Those sound like some really lonely girls. Not to mention how hard a time they're going to have of it dealing with them when they become adults. They'll also fall way behind girls who do interact with them and they'll never get laid unless they get desperate."

Taiga gulped. "Um... Le-let's please try to keep the language G-rated please alright?" She asked pleadingly.

Yukari spoke next. "I see and talk with boys all the time at museums, tank shows and stuff. I actually always got along with them better than I did with girls a lot of the time."

Anchovy rolled her eyes but said nothing, while Kay leaned forward and smirked. "Are you bragging then Oddball?"

"Gah! Ah, ah of course not! I would never conceive of trying to boast about anything to any of you ladies. I-I respect you all too much for that! B-b-b-besides I don't know anything about romance; I think I'm just too young."

"A girl is never to young for romance." Anchovy said sagely. "Only too young to explore it fully." Giggles drifted in from the audience and a few cheeky grins appeared at the table as well.

Everyone's eyes simultaneously drifted towards Katyusha. Everyone was probably curious whether the petulant little teen had any idea what was going on or was covering her ears to prevent from hearing it. Much to everyone's surprise and confusion, she was actually on her phone. A bit unusual and perhaps rude since she was supposed to be having a debate with everyone, and she was on a show. But she held up her phone and waved it to everyone. "Katyusha was looking at the Chirper feed and found a question we should talk about that's related to what we were just discussing."

Taiga was relieved that Katyusha had at least been doing something relevant on her device; although, she would have preferred it if Katyusha kept the question answering to her. "Oh, alright Katyusha. What question do you think we should answer?" A feral smile creeped over Katyusha's face and Taiga suddenly got a bad feeling.

"Ahem. HeftyHestia says: 'Tankery is just a, quote: 'ladies club'. They don't want boys interfering with all their girlxgirl culture that tankery seems to foster. I say saving boys from that means we will have at least some able to populate the species." Her quoting done, Katyusha replaced her phone back into it's holster like pouch and sat with her hands held together on the table with a degree of calm that would rival Darjeeling, ruined only by the poorly concealed smugness on her seemingly prepubescent face. The other girls at the table sat in stunned silence, even Darjeeling looked shocked beyond words. Taiga began uttering incoherent noises before she finally managed to speak a few words.

"K-k-ka-kat-Katyusha, why would you bring something like that up?" Taiga had just pleaded with everyone to keep things G-rated and now Katyusha had gone and brought up such a controversial issue. She had been specifically avoiding these sorts of questions, and there were a great many about the rather close relationships many girls in the tankery teams seemed to have, or at least the level of devotion from some of them seemed to be totally beyond what people expected of a comrade or subordinate. Maybe they could just forget this questions, maybe it was just Katyusha being immature and trying to sound grown up. Maybe they could still-

Katyusha slammed her little fist on the table, but the loud noise that resulted made it sound like it had been made by a hammer and it jolted the girls from their stunned stupor.

"Katyusha is tired of people making stupid assumptions about her comrades and friends in tankery. Sick of people saying slanderous things about them that aren't true and making them seem like someone they're not!" She stood up and brought her gaze upon the others at the table, some were surprised that Katyusha actually intended to make a serious argument, while others were surprised that she even knew a word like 'slanderous.' "Katyusha thinks you can be close to someone without being in love with them. What's so wrong about trusting someone so much you would put your life in their hands? That you would trust them with your deepest darkest secrets? That you would go out of your way to make them happy? Isn't that just what a friend is supposed to be? A close one maybe, but friends are supposed to do that right?" There was a moment's pause, and even the normally furious live chat on the stream seemed to take a moment to contemplate Katyusha's words. The sound of more hands hitting the table attracted everyone's attention to a new source, and much to everyone's surprise, it was the normally shy and soft spoken Yukari Akiyama.

"I-I know what you mean!" She said resolutely. "People seem to get the wrong idea, even if you do it just to support someone. That you have someone you want to help and be useful to, because that person helps you feel like you matter, that you're worth something, that you can make a difference!" She looked over the other girls at the table just as Katyusha had done before. "If you had someone like that in your life, wouldn't you do the same? Just because you are devoted to someone, just because you feel like you owe them so much, shouldn't automatically mean that you're in love with them!" Yukari was almost screaming near the end of her fiery rant. It was clear that, like Katyusha, she felt very strongly about this, and was likely a victim of it.

It was no secret among those in the tankery community, especially it's participants, that Yukari was very devoted to her captain, Miho Nishizumi. The two almost seemed inseparable and Yukari always came fiercely to Miho's aid whenever the latter was confronted with criticism or adversity. It was also no big secret about the lengths Yukari was willing to go to ensure the success of her captain and her whole team. Likewise of course, those who practiced or had once practiced tankery could understand Yukari's actions and feelings for what they were, but it seemed that, like everything else, the ignorant masses so willingly misunderstood relatively simple matters and blew them utterly out of proportion until an obtuse virtual reality was created from the hive mind of those masses which bled profusely into everyone else's reality.

Darjeeling ran the tip of her index finger around the rim of her teacup slowly, her eyes deep in thought. Kay simply scratched her head and shrugged. "Well I don't think there's anything wrong in either case, but I don't see a lot of the 'devotion' you girls talk about. Tankery's all about having fun. I guess it only happens in teams that take it too seriously."

"Or maybe you're just lacking something." Anchovy admonished. She grabbed her riding crop and slapped it on the table in front of Kay who barely flinched and then the two locked eyes as Anchovy went on. "Rich in money, poor in spirit. Your team doesn't seem to take anything seriously, even outside of tankery. I'm more impressed by your cheerleaders than any of your team. They at least seem to have passion and drive. You could learn some things from them." Kay glared back at her balefully, possibly for daring to compare her and her teams to 'mere cheerleaders', but she said nothing and Anchovy appeared unfazed.

Darjeeling rested her palms on the table and lifted her gaze from her teacup to look at the other girls. "I am grateful to have gotten close to many people over the course of my life thus far. I have many girls in my life I would not hesitate to call my sister, even though we share little if any blood. There are many kinds of intimacy, not all of which are of a sexual nature. Contrary to the unwashed plebeians of the sort that wrote such a spiteful comment, one does not need to be romantically involved with someone or related to someone to be intimate with them. Sad as it is, the fact that so many people misunderstand the precious bonds that we in the chivalrous sport of tankery develop and cherish, are so misunderstood and slandered, it also means that most people do not have such priceless bonds, and as unfortunate as that is, it also means that those bonds are more special, more unique, even more precious. I can't imagine life without them, but if such comments are any indication, it is a life I would not want."

Nods of agreement, more felt than seen, passed along almost everyone at the table. This odd, almost surreal outpouring of genuine passion, emotion and feeling; for Taiga, she rather felt like an outsider. Sure there would often be times where the panel guests would talk about things she couldn't even begin to understand, but right now, in this moment, she felt like she was from a totally different culture entirely.

Ritaiko took a deep breath and decided to add her own two cents to the conversation. "At Black Forest Peak, we hold camaraderie in high esteem. We always want to do our best not only for a common goal, but also for our team mates and comrades. Our commanders try hard to give us victory, to make sure we are accomplishing something. Leading us successfully towards our goal. Even if we don't attain it, even if we feel like we failed, we are able to hold together individually because as a whole we are strongly bonded. We are devoted to our commanders, especially to our captain because they are people we look up to, that we want to emulate. They take the weight of command and our trust onto their shoulders and do their hardest not to let us down. Is it really surprising that we would go to great lengths to support them? That we would admire these amazing people so much that we would jump through hoops to do something that would earn their approval, that would help the whole reach its goal? We have purpose, and we have desire, and we have a way to use that, not only for ourselves, but for mutual benefit with our comrades!"

Everyone at the table seemed to more or less agree with Ritaiko's statements. Whatever reservations or animosities the girls had for each other, they were all gone for the moment, banished to some dark corner where it could not be seen, heard or touched, even if Kay didn't seem to feel as strongly as the other girls did and Anchovy didn't seem willing, at least for the moment, to provide her own testimony if she had one. Although Ritaiko had essentially reiterated some of what Anchovy had said about camaraderie.

"Time to wrap it up" Umi uttered quietly through the earpiece. The voice snapped Taiga from her state of awe and admiration. She cleared her throat before looking up into the camera and speaking.

Thank you everyone for sharing. This has been a very informative and indeed inspiring discussion. I'm sure everyone here and at home feels much better for it." She looked back into the camera. "Well that's all for us tonight folks. I would like to thank every member or our panel for attending tonight out or their free time and to thank Anzio for providing us with the delightful snacks. We'll see you next week at the same time so until then, good night."

The audience clapped and the camera view pulled away to show all members at the table together, some trying to rapidly finish their neglected snacks after their passionate exchanges and screen faded to black with a single white lettered message replacing the view of the studio that read: "See you next time."


End file.
